~Current Affairs~

Am looking forward to my long break next week! Really feel that a break would do me good. Hopefully I will be motivated at work after the rest. But after serious thoughts, I think the change of environment is really necessary. I am a workaholic by nature, I like to work; loves recognition for my efforts; loves the ability of being in control of my work; feels good when someone sees me as someone intellectual and not a brainless one. In fact, my wish is to be someone with both brains and looks. Haha…

Well, really must work harder in getting my dream job at such bad times. The recession is stepping in. But, I cannot stay for comfort. Hmm… a lot of risks though. But I really wanna achieve something in my career. I have relaxed quite abit in my current job and the time is necessary for me to move on. Bless me! I need a lot of support too! Just gotta keep my fingers crossed. But, whenever I think of job switch, the incident half a yr ago always haunt me. Till date, I still cannot comprehend the reasons behind the evil plot. I cannot accept the reasons for the plot, the idea is simply too evil. It has changed my perceptions towards things and friends. Bottomline …. The hurts caused will be unforgettable.

Just did a new image again! Well, just feel the old curls were not nicely done and make me look rather mature and messy. With upcoming wedding dinners and annual dinner, decided an image change. Wohoo… Not only that, I am going to have strict diet for the next few weeks. Reduce intake of my favourite of chilli, fried stuffs, cakes, pasta … gonna miss food~~~ decide to have only soupy and less oil stuffs for the next few weeks. Hopefully to shed few kilograms! Haa!

Enough of me … the current affairs in news I guess is about the bombing at Mumbai and protestors’ attacks at Thailand. Many people have died in both situations. A lot of tensions, fears and uncertainties. Innocent lives been taken away… feel sad … pitiful… so unexpected and the people who have died … their families and all …. I wished … all these would stop soon … seriously, isn’t peace better?

Met C* about a fortnight ago. She’s always someone I look upon as someone very nice and I wanna be her friend forever one. Very sweet, kind hearted girl, innocent … we used to be very closed for a period of time, but due to some reasons, we drifted apart. Till date, I still have her bookmark hanging at my office desk’s here with words on it - “Friends to love and care, to talk and share, to trust and always being there” We did not really went through a lot of things together, but strangely I always think she is someone that I think I can trust and have a deep friendship with. I guess it’s fate? Keke… even friendship, I deemed fate… =p Anyway, she’s troubled by the problems of the heart. She’s very sad. I can tell and she’s not telling me anything but putting a very brave front. I really wish she can get through these soon. Life is always full of ups and downs … Hope to see her smiling from her heart soon…

Celebrated another best buds friend, C* last week. A simple celebration - dinner and movie. Simple, but I think for now, simple is good. Happiness can be achieved with the most simple things. Hope she enjoy her mini celebration, hope she like the gift and hope all her wishes come true.

P/S : Getting Sentimental ... Listening - Way Back Into Love ....

~knowing Myself~ ???

You are longing for some love and affection at this time - not that you have been deprived of tender loving care - but there are times when everyone needs to try something new or to go 'somewhere' else to perhaps experience that little extra 'understanding'.

You seem to lack the energy of late to get up and go. Your objectives appear to be unattainable and no one seems to care. You feel lost, neglected and need some W.T.C. (Warm tender care).
Enough is enough - but the problems never seem to stop. They never stop. You feel, and maybe you are right, that the problems seem to go on and on and you have indeed had more than your fair share of trials and tribulations. But to give you credit - you bounce back time and time again - you stick to your beliefs because deep down you have that inner knowledge, that 'belief' system that in the end, everything will turn out OK - and you are right -it will!

The unwanted situation in which you presently find yourself is causing you considerable stress and frustration and your feeling is that whatever you try to do to remedy this is to no avail. You feel trapped. You want to get away from it all as you feel that you are banging your head against a brick wall getting nowhere. You have turned your aggression inwards and you are furious with yourself for not being able to achieve your goals. You need to go away, somewhere where there are less restrictions and where you can be free to make your own decisions.

You are worn out - suffering from what has been described as 'burnout' and nothing seems to stimulate you to break away from this state of lethargy. This situation is causing an acute distress situation and not being able immediately to resolve the problems is exposing you to excess stress and tension. You are endeavouring to break away from this situation by withdrawing into a state of 'Never Never Land' - an illusory substitute world in which things could be as you would like them to be. Now is the time to take time-out - to relax. A short break is all that you need and you will find that matters will resolve themselves.

P/S : Seems rather zhun .... hmm....

Balaclava Night & Lunar Night~~~~

Singapore is really a very small dot on the world map and with limited things to do… or simply cuz my life is too boring ?

Since the days I start to mix around with friends, other than shopping, movies the usual meet up is for drink, ktv or dance these days. And all activities can drain my money. LOL

I can be a rather slack person. I really prefer to rot at home and do nothing. Oh … just lie on my bed and see my favourite dramas… but these days … I really do not have much time to slack at my fav activities… my sleeping time is like only 4 – 5 hours a day during my weekdays. As a result, I usually sleep until late on sat or sun. then follow by my household activities which include washing my clothes, packing my room abit, bathing my dog … and if I am in Malaysia, of course all these activities are put on hold … and I gotta squeeze everything on weekdays … haiz…. My weekend burnt with mahjong over at Malaysia…

Squeezing my stuffs on weekdays is really tiring lor….my parents always grumble at me as I dun come straight home for dinner thus my time is not enuff for all these household activities… by the time I reach home already almost 7.30. And one I am home, I dun feel like doin anything but sleep. Lazy bum … well … I need to change my life abit…

Met F* Mei last week for a quick dinner and drinks at Balaclava. It has been awhile since I last met her and Balaclava too. She’s still very much the same but of course they are changes as we stepped into the working world. And the topic lingering us that night was “friendship”. Is there a expired date for “friendship” ? (P/S … Pics not upload yet … dun chase me … lol)

I think … “friendship” is similar to relationship. Needs frequency, trust, communication, understanding and care & concern etc … If I were to rank these points to have a good friendship, I would choose … “understanding”. If one truly understands your friend, you will know her character, her points, her flaws, her needs, her concern etc. But establishing friendship is not easy. Especially between girls I think. Personally, I think there are a lot of hidden truths, hidden lies between girls. They may be the best friends around and still have unhappiness towards each other. Jealousy, selfishness, attention all comes in resulting in all these hidden stuffs. I guess that’s with girls.

Well … I have a character that most people dislike. It’s true! Just that people do not blurt it out. Thus resulting in people refusing to establishing a true friendship with me. Friends whom I know for years always nagged at me saying that I am too trusting, naïve. I guess … for now … I need to agree… I have been betrayed my friends a couple of times and seems … I have not learnt. Comparatively, the hurt from getting betrayed by your own “close” friend compared to a partner is more painful. You shared most of your things with your friend before your partner. SO… I envy those who claims their partner is their best friend. If there’s hurt, it will be just once. LOL

Enough … Last sat I had a really wonderful time with white angel and gang. We went Lunar and ordered vodka. Initially we thought that we cannot finish that bottle cuz we dun drink much. But … we finished that bottle!!! 3 out of the group ended up drunk… LOL … Became merlions for the night … I love the ambience… Seems “ah beng and ah lian” type of clubbing but I like.. Songs by Alex~~~ wohoo~~~ a good corner that we took and we can danced at our own little area, take hell lot of crazy pictures and drink. I really had a lot of fun… It has been really long while since I dance… And it has been a long while since I can be REALLY happy? Forgetting …. Forgetting … some stuffs …..

P/S : 你不是真正的快乐,,你的笑只是你穿的保护色,你决定不恨了也决定不爱了,把你的灵魂关在永远锁上的躯壳