Random

october was a super tough month for me. suffocating to the max. glad it's over but the problem's still there... but i really hope my problem will be resolve one day and i would not be haunted by such things again!

40 days left for 2011. time really passes by so quickly ever since i left school. it passes by so much so until my life is so routine until i really quite loss about the kind of life i am leading.

i realize that my mood fluctuates easily. Every month, there will be a period of super peh chekness coming from me. I lose my patience, temper so easily until i think i am nuts. serious.

anyway, A* came to Singapore again last month. nothing much of his agenda probably he misses Asia too much. he's like more excited to see me this time and more warmth. me instead wasn't that excited then. been too busy with events at work plus my free lance. but i guess i grew tired of the distance thingy and plus i dont like a not clear situation thus became tired. And.. probably he's coming back to SG in Jan again. hmm... i dont know what he want and i guess i probably should not think too much about things. need to learn not to be serious over alot of things. but it's not easy. probably been hurt too much and now i think i cant joke much about things.

work frustrations happen almost everyday! seriously. it's getting very bad. and i have been bitching with J* alot her and others. we are just too gam and if it's not for her, i think i would have left. She has the same sentiments. i am so likeable~~ haha well.. it's really difficult to find a perfect job, earn enough, nice colleagues, good opportunities, good location. i have always tell myself i do not have the luck of getting something that i like but i do get something's pretty good for me. am i asking too much?

nevertheless.. hope my free lance is good for me and i can achieve what i want in life. my mentor's pretty nice and i think he's pretty nice. he can be very irritating but he's a smart guy and pretty serious. well. i think i am quite blessed to have people around me who actually are quite nice to me. i am grateful for all these and i believe more good would come.

i need to get over all the unhappy things that has been haunting me for very long or hoping miracles would happen. things that deserve to change would be miracles. things that deserve to be forgotten shall be gladly washed away.

i shall end my post with these words written in front of my pc reminding me to be hang on~

"Whatever with the past has gone. The best is always yet to come. "

i hope my best will come soon.