Confused

been rather moody recently .. i do not know why. been doing meaningless things. been obessed with 阿信 ... been flirting with my idol at work ... been crying due to unfairness at home.

a week of happiness birthday celebration, but now i felt empty inside. am i leading a life of my own? i do not know...

i been obessed with 阿信 ever since the concert. he's just so charming. the kind of guy that i go gaga over ... lol ... simple, funny,boyish, cool, musically inclined, soft spoken, gentle .. well .. i still like the bad-boy style .. but 阿信 really make me go crazy since 26th april 08... =p if only i would have a bf or husband like him ... haha ... i wish ... my birthday wish this year? lol

flirting with my idol at work ... i dun know if this consider ... but been emailing him now and then and i bought him a coke that day secretly becuz of a forward mail that day ... somehow, we started talking on emails. i dun dare to talk to him much when i see him though cuz i blush... i wonder why ... but ... he's married ... haiz .. well ... i know i will control .. but kinda disappointing ... haha .. and today .. in return for the coke i bought him ... he got a surprise for me too ... he left a plastic bag on my table contAining snacks .. haha .. this is going to be a bit too much right .. oh well .. i better constrain myself ... otherwise, i get burnt again ... haha

as for unfairness at home ... my family seems to hate me... haha .. or shld i say .. they dun seems to understand me ... and they neva really felt that i am older now? haa .. it's painful when you dun feel trust from ur own family .. oh well ... it has been like this for long ... and i wonder when will i be out of the cage ....